TRAIN THRU MY BATHROOM WINDOW + earlier blogs fromRRR

Thursday, December 18, 2014
TRAIN THRU MY BATHROOM WINDOW…………DEATH CAN COME QUICK LIKE THAT

Thursday, December 18, 2014
TRAIN THRU MY BATHROOM WINDOW…………DEATH CAN COME QUICK LIKE THAT

I’ve got a case of DREAD this very moment,
this very moment. I don’t feel I can step outside.
A storm blew in last night, a wind from all directions,
and white, white, white snow everywhere…I hear
the snowploughs scraping along the street. And
I have all my Christmas shopping to do
and no money,
I really need a drink./ But what is this urgency?
I got the Fear, the pre-Christmas panic mode.
I’m supposed to be an expert at survival in these
times…. but now, not so much… the madness
has set in and I’m looking both ways.
I don’t want to be run over by something.
A train whistle blew. I jumped.
The sound seems to have come
from my bathroom – but that’s impossible – we’re talking
about 100,000 tons of heavy metal. Still
the whistle was fucking loud, loud enough to be
disturbing, My nerves are shot and if things get
any worse, I’ll…
Things can always get worse. Make no
mistake, dread knows no bounds.Fear respects
no fences. In the land of Nod machines grind it out,
whether lubricated or not.
I took a bus once… to escape. That didn’t work
out quite so well. I left a hut in the Great White North
and found myself in a locked cell in the Big Smoke. The
influence of the native people in this land
has never been fully understood.
My hands are shaking too much to
turn a page… I was looking into “Guillermo’s Inferno.”
Guillermo is a savage book . And at the moment
I’m afraid to look into it.
Felt like I was almost hit by a train. No EXAGGERATION.

You ever walk along railway tracks after midnight?
Everything’s silent. There’s a bit of a moon over the horizon…
and a slight breeze in the leaves of the forest.
Everything is still silent, but what you see is –
you see your shadow ahead of you on the tracks.
You see your own shadow in the headlight of the
train sweeping up behind you!
If you’re fast like me and a bit of an athlete,
and if you’re lucky, too,you dive for the gully off the tracks…
A split second later the train whistles by in a whoosh
of wind and air.
The engineer sees you at the last second,
and he doesn’t blow the train whistle until the train
has already passed you… And you’re lying
in the ditch looking up in wonderment at all
the heavy steel rolling past. All of a sudden.

Assumptions can kill you. I had
assumed you could always hear a train coming.
Not so!
This freight train was rolling downhill
and the engines were coasting. The night was
silent and the train didn’t make a sound whistling
up behind me until it was past me down the tracks.
Death can come quick like that.

(C)2014 W.G. Milne
Posted by William Milne at 8:35 AM
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Tuesday, December 16, 2014
OF SEX, JEALOUSY AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

OF SEX, JEALOUSY AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

WHEN I WANTED to have sex with a woman,
I I’d tell her I loved her. And believe me, I did at the
time. Every woman I said, “I love you to”… well,
I still love each and every one of them… when I think of
each one I have fond thoughts in my heart.
But what good does this do for the woman?
Not to say that hot sex and orgasmic joy aren’t important.
They bloody well are. And to help a woman come to orgasm
for the first time in her 35 years, this is a service of sorts.
I don’t wish to disparage this sort of thing.
I’d be in bed with one woman in the afternoon.
Then race across town and have dinner with a second
woman then take her home. Then around midnight
I’d head off and have sex with a third woman. And
believe me, I’m not bragging.
I no longer think sexual unions are that important.
But I’m slightly older now and I am not longer
utterly controlled by raging testosterone.
The problem with having sex with three different
women in the same day, you have to lie to them.
Often these gals know they’re being lied to and they
don’t much care. But not always.

The aspect about lying, which no one talks
about, is that it becomes a kind of hell. Not for
the persons being lied to… but for the liar.
The hell the liar enters is not so much that no one
believes him. The hell the liar comes to reside in
is this: he believes no one else.
After a time, he becomes certain that the woman or women he’s loving… he becomes certain that she or they
are deceiving him. Then jealousy takes over… and a
terrible rage follows the jealousy he feels.
I remember kicking down doors late at night
and seizing any suitors that happened to be there
by the throat, and shaking them like a dog shakes
a rag in his mouth.
After a while, the whole gig gets tiresome.
And it takes up nearly all of your time.

With sex & desire — you always want more.

“Now that you’ve got what you want, do you want more?”
Bob Marley

With unconditional love — when you really think of the
other person, when you care about that person whatever she does….. Haviing been a terrible person yourself, you can forgive the crimes and misdemeanours of others…
You might get hurt, but you realize you’ve hurt
other people, too… so this is a kind of karma,
something you deserve.

When you love others unconditionally, a joy comes of this,
When you feel ” the expanding of love beyond desire” *
….you are in love with the universe…. And because
the universe is a sentient being, your love is returned
ten-fold
All the people you have known, all the women you have
loved…become One Love. And yes, that’s the title
of a Jamaican song..

When you love a particular rose** (person)while seeing at the same time all his or her defects, pettiness, selfishness, stupidity etc, this is the beginning of unconditional love…
and this is the beginning of lasting joy in your life
this is the beginning of peace.

* T.S. Eliot
** “The Little Prince” ST. Exupery

(C)2014 W.G. Milne
Posted by William Milne at 1:37 AM
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Saturday, December 13, 2014
LIVING IN THE GRAND HOTEL..THE GREAT CIRCLE OF LIFE .. DOES HARRISON FORD HAVE A BROTHER?

So I wake up this morning and before coffee
I’m sort of half watching a movie called, “Two Weeks Notice.” Hugh Grant plays a ruthless real estate developer who lives at the Grand Hotel,
supposedly in New York.
I realize that people love these rags to
riches stories where two poor people fall in love and
realize that one of them is rich, yada yada, or something like this. Of course, they always end up
driving away in a limosene and everybody’s
happy, happy, happy at the end.
I like happy endings, even if most of
them are utter nonsense… I figure life is
depressing enough, and people don’t need
other poeple to prick their balloons,
however unrealistic their dreams might be.
The fact of the matter is that
no matter how happy the bullshit ending
is, it can never match the real cosmic joy possible
in the smallest corner of the universe, available
to all of us right here, right now.
But this is rough stuff and hard to
get to, since the divine altar and playground
is atop some magic moutain with slippery sides
that is always difficult to climb.

So here are some ironic facts. The Grand Hotel in the movie is in Toronto not New York.
I know because I lived in the hotel for several
months. The hotel was not glitzy when I lived there.
The hotel had been a grand hotel, but it was
run down. It had high ceilings and big bathtubs,
but that was about all.
The truth of the matter is
is I was in the midst of an alcoholic bender
and I had just found the dubious wonders
of crack cocaine.
The bar downstairs was seedy in those
days, just the way I liked draft rooms. I’d
go down and sit at the bar and drink plenty
of draft and then watch whatever deranged
floor show they put on that evening.
One late afternoon I ran into a guy
who looked just like Harrison Ford. He was drinking
right next to me. Eventually he asked me for
a light. I gave him one and realized, “Hell! This guy
sounds just like Harrison Ford!”
I told him this fact and it turns out
he was very aware of it. Why? Because he
was Harrison Ford’s brother. It turns out
he had just come back from some adventure
in the Arctic.
So we had plenty to talk about
because I’d also worked up and down the
Mackenzie River. Even if we had had nothing in
common, after about my fifth or sixth draft,
I want to talk. So did he. Was his name
George?
Anyway life is ironic, I’m thinking.
I,too, have aspirations to develop some
land which I purchased decades ago.
But I’m not a ruthless developer. Each lake
is someone’s drinking water, sooner
or later.
My story is more of a riches to rags story,
but I was also living at the Grand Hotel
talking to Harrison Ford’s brother. And life
to me has always seemed to be
highly romantic.
I’m always happiest not knowing
what’s going to come around the next
corner. What I believe is required
for a happy life is, “A SENSE OF POSSIBILITIES”.
I had that sense back then.
And I have that sense right now this
morning. So I’m a happy camper.
The great mysterious Circle of
Life keeps spinning around, repeating
similar stories over and over again…
with ironic differences.

I’d have it no other way.

Posted by William Milne at 9:29 AM
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Friday, December 12, 2014
SANTA’S GUIDE TO: SURVIVING YOUR PERSONAL FETISH……….CASES FROM THE FEMALE ORGASM CLINIC………….MY BOOKS AT AMAZON

Amazon.com: WILLIAM MILNE: Books, Biography, Blog …
http://www.amazon.com/WILLIAM-MILNE/e/B00JF9UE9E
Visit Amazon.com’s WILLIAM MILNE Page and shop for all WILLIAM MILNE books and other WILLIAM MILNE related products (DVD, CDs, Apparel). Check out …

1. Amazon.com: William Milne: Books, Biography, Blog …
http://www.amazon.com/William-Milne/e/B00LXVXR1O
Visit Amazon.com’s William Milne Page and shop for all William Milne books and other William Milne related products (DVD, CDs, Apparel). Check out pictures …

1. Amazon.co.uk: William Milne: Books, Biogs, Audiobooks …
http://www.amazon.co.uk/William-Milne/e/B00LXVXR1O
Visit Amazon.co.uk’s William Milne Page and shop for all William Milne books. Check out pictures, bibliography, biography and community discussions about …

A COMIC’S APPROACH TO HALLUCINATIONS
AND TOXIC PSYCHOSIS
http://www.amazon.com.au/COMICS-APPROACH…AND…/B00HBQU75E
William Milne (Author) … (6 December 2013); Sold by: Amazon Australia Services, Inc. Language: English; ASIN: B00HBQU75E; Text-to-Speech: Enabled.

The above is what I found when I googled my own name with amazon.com.
I have an Author’s Page at amazon
with “SANTA’S URBAN SURVIVAL GUIDE” listed there.
The other books are:
“SANTA’S GUIDE TO: SURVIVING YOUR PERSONAL FETISH”

There is also: THE SECOND COMING OF CHRIST:
MOST ANCIENT GOSPEL FOUND ANEW

There’s plenty of humour in most of my books…
In the book, “MOST ANCIENT GOSPEL FOUND ANEW”, not so much.

(As I’m sure you now, the “BOO###### numbers listed
above are identification numbers of my books at amazon)

*

Now I find this book to be hilarious! Not all critics agree. One of them even sank so low as to call me a pervert.
You be the judge.
The first chapter is entitled: ‘BRANDING FETISH NOT ENCOURAGED IN MOST CIVILIZED COUNTRIES AND RARELY A NECESSARY EXTREME”
Some of the chapters are derived from cases
in THE FEMALE ORGASM CLINIC, which I ran for several years as a highly successful
therapist.
Orgasm repression in female patients
is a dreadful psychological illness, which
I invariably cured. Sometimes with the aid
of electrical devices.

(You can read most of the first chapter at amazon for free)

Posted by William Milne at 12:47 PM
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Thursday, December 11, 2014
A COMIC’S GUDE TO HALLUCINATIONS AND TOXIC PSYCHOSIS
WILLIAM MILNE William Milne
WILLIAM MILNE and WALKER BALLANTINE
and
WALKER BALLANTINE

THE SECOND COMING OF CHRIST, MOST ANCIENT GOSPEL FOUND ANEW
£1.88
Kindle Edition
A COMIC’S APPROACH TO HALLUCINATIONS AND TOXIC-PSYCHOSIS

Posted by William Milne at 10:56 AM
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Saturday, December 6, 2014
GUILLERMO’S INFERNO — WRITING IN UTTER FLOW!!!

I tell ya, I’ve been pulling my punches. And I’m
sick of it! It’s hard to relax when
you’re only half saying what you mean
out of what? Out of FEAR that I”m OFFENDING somebody?
NAH, it can’t be that can it? I’ve been offensive
(without even trying) for so many years that
most people cross the street when they see me coming,
or they pretend not to see me at all, as they look up at
the sky, or squint at some billboard off in the
distance, until I’ve passed by… (and they’re sure I’m not likely to return)
It’s not so much that others hate me, it’s just
the people who don’t know me think I’m weird, so maybe
there’s an element of fear in their approach. Me, I just
make sure they’re not armed.
Just like you have to do with your neighbourhood dope fiend – when you get a little near to him – make sure he’s not carrying a firearm. The large gleaming bowie
knife he fondles and keeps lovingly at his side, you won’t have any trouble spotting that.

This is not how I live my life ( pulling
my punches, and showing fearful restraint)
I’ll be damned if this is how I’m gonna write.
People say to non-expert writers, “If
you could only write the way you talk,
you’d be a great writer!”
Well, damn right! When I talk with pals
in a bar, I swear a lot. Swearing helps in
humour. Sweating is necessary when you’re
mad… and swearing is essential sometimes
when you’re having hot, dirty sex.
Writing is like all these activities.
Writing is best when you swear, when
you don’t pull words to be polite, when
you’re spontaneous… and when you’re
relating a story about dirty sex.
Obscenity? There’s no such thing!

THOUGH there are some gestures

SOMETIMES YOU’LL SURPRISE YOURSELF!
Well, you can’t write, if you don’t hit the keys!
Whatever your state of mind
However deranged you might be
There is no thought too ugly to consider
There is no truth too ugly to see.

Some of the best writing I ever did
was right after I was charged with a serious
criminal offence. I shot a man. And I knew
very well I had no choice about it.
It was a self-defence situation, defence or
death. I was also defending members
of my family.
When they finally let me out on bail… after 90 days
solitary confinement… bare-assed – dressed in
some nutty asbestos top….
the cell was dark….
and there was no water in it….
I did not have water to drink unless I asked for it
thru a slot at groin level, I asked : “Could I have some water,
please?”

I was deeply offended that I was charged. I was
angry in a way I had never been before. I was hopping mad. It was liberating. I wrote, “Guillermo’s Inferno” in an utter
state of flow… I was in such a rage… I never
bothered to edit myself. I never even considered it.
So this is it! The unedited brilliance
of a mind liberated thru accusations and solitary confinement…
No punches are pulled.

If you expect politeness, go elsewhere.
Really dark, funny dark… Not for you if you’re feeling delicate this morning. Not for pussies.

GUILLERMO’S INFERNO

I’ll post the first few pages of this book… then offer it for sale at
a soon to be announced site.

But I’m half Jamaican. “Soon come” can
take longer than expected.
Posted by William Milne at 7:57 AM
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Thursday, November 27, 2014
WHO DIS FUCKER… SAME AS WOT?

save as wot??? WHO DIS, FUcKER????
WHAT YOU DO?

Come back right soon/……. load up & aim
… at you…
… watch neighbour sister sucking grass…
I show you………………how…….I make it to….. success.
………………………..I make it!
Who was it again, I wanted to impress?

“Who, momma, who?” **********

She was lying close to the edges of the park
overlooking the river. No one could help
her now…

*************************
I don’t know, man. I don’t have the wisdom to tell this story.
….. I saw it….
but….. I don’t want to ever
fight against the cosmogeographicaldemoic press.
The story with the dollar gripped
between a schoolgirl’s teeth….

I can tell the story. (But most of you
ladies – you know -I can’t accept much more of this.)
.. “Who was it, once again…tell me. Who was it I’m supposed to pleasure?” she asked……….”Tell me one more time, brother, what was it exactly? Who is it…? Who am I supposed to impress?”

Who, motherfucker, who?

____

Posted by William Milne at 8:14 PM
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Wednesday, November 26, 2014
WHAT IS WALT WHITMAN’S SECRET? HINTS FROM “LEAVES OF GRASS”

Henry Miller wrote: “For Walt Whitman every day
is Saturday afternoon.”

A friend of mine said: “I feel jealous when I read
Whitman. He always seems
to be feeling so damn good!”

Does Walt, himself, ever speak of a secret? Yes,
he does. “Do I have a secret?” he asks.
“Yes, I do. For the fifth month flowers have.”

“It is a painful thing to love a man or woman to excess, and yet it satisfies,
it is great,
But there is something else very great,
it makes the whole coincide,
It, magnificent, beyond materials, with continuous
hands sweeps and provides for all.

…Know you, solely to drop in the earth the germs
of a greater religion.

After the birth of Walt Whitman’s “Leaves of Grass”,
people born and bred in the West no longer needed
to travel to the East to gain wisdom.
Walt had an awakening experience of some kind,
his whole book is a hymn to you and to the
magnificent “It” that carries us and makes
the globe and the seas cohere.

“Leaves of Grass” is a great ocean of a book,
but do not be intimidated. You can jump in anywhere
and emerge with a fish that can give your
life meaning.

He’s one of the few natural seers
we’ve had in the West.

Walt says:”There was never more inception than there is now,
Nor any more youth or age than there is now;
And will never be any more perfection than there is now,
Nor any more heaven of hell than there is now.”( Song of Myself)

Then he adds “I AND THIS MYSTERY HERE WE STAND.” (Capitals mine)
What Walt is getting at throughout the waves and rhythms of his work
is exactly the same truth the early Christians meditated in order to see.
Though Walt can make the whole business more fun.

“I pass death with the dying, and birth with the
new-washed babe
…… and am not contained between my hat and boots.

“Do you think it’s lucky to be born?’ he asks,
“It’s just as lucky to die and I know it.”

“I am the mate and the companion of people, all
just as immortal and fathomless as myself;
They do no know how immortal, but I know.”

As you read “Leaves of Grass” you’ll find hints
and clues left there for you. It’s an exciting read when
you figure out that you are finding the keys to
a puzzle. Walt’s left 1000 hints for you, but it is
for you to find the meaning of the puzzle.

When Walt says, “I stop somewhere waiting
for you,” he’s not kidding.

NOTE: The above is taken from a thesis on Walt Whitman,
by W.G.Milne called: “Walt Whitman, His Intricate Purpose.”
Posted by William Milne at 4:10 AM
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Tuesday, November 25, 2014
DEATH IS BRIEF FOR SUCH AS THESE

To the journeyman within
There are points of light
Round the curve of this planet
In the psyche’s dark;
Lights glow over oceans
Beyond mountains, across harbours
And through seas, and these
Lights are conscious points;
Where realized minds, saints,
Monks, teachers, masters, sufis,
Bodhisattvas, across the cosmos
The light of knowing, pervades
Penetrates the distances, glowing,
Piercing the heavy mists with
Such soft glowing through the fog,
Through starlight and the centuries
Lights of companions who die not
Whose minds surround the globe
In the night never viewed
By those lost in commerce
Buying and selling, getting and spending,
Women and men imbibing temporal pursuits
Never see these friends, these
Luminous globes through the night
These brave ones who have gone before
Who do not abandon us
But who wait patiently for our
Liberation. They reach a hand to us
And wait, patient as spring rain.

(C)2014 by W.G.Milne
Posted by William Milne at 4:13 AM
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To apprehend THE INTERSECTION OF THE TIMELESS WITH TIME, IS AN OCCUPATION FOR THE SAINT

To apprehend this timeless place, this is an occupation of the saint. So says T.S.Eliot.
“A lifetime’s death in love.”

It is said ego death is necessary to open a place
within you… where Grace might visit.

It is necessary to try to find the place
the law of which is not to try. Through self-surrender
the gift may come to us… gift that gives
the vibrant meaning of things.

“… to apprehend
The point of intersection of the timeless
With time, is an occupation for the saint –
No occupation either, but something given
And taken, in a lifetime’s death in love,
Ardour and selflessness and self-surrender.”

A quest, a focus on ‘something given and
taken, in a lifetime’s death in love.’
Here where the past and future are conquered…

“The hint half guessed, the gift half understood,
is Incarnation.”

“For most of us, there is only the unattended
Moment, the movement in and out of time,
The distraction fit, lost in a shaft of sunlight,
The wild thyme unseen, or the winter lightning
Or the waterfall, or music heard so deeply
That it is not heard at all.”

To find the timeless place of Incarnation.

“For most of us, this is the aim
Never here to be realised;
Who are only undefeated
Because we have gone on trying.”

Living near to the mystic ground

“We, content at the last
If our temporal reversion nourish
(Not too far from the yew-tree)
The life of significant soil.”

Words taken from “The Four Quartets” by T.S. Eliot,
“The Dry Salvages, V”

(C)2014 by W.G.Milne
Posted by William Milne at 3:31 AM
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Monday, November 24, 2014
SURVIVAL HUMOUR – SOME QUESTIONS IT’S BEST NOT TO ASK IN WAIT-A-BIT!

It is said, “The world’s a comedy for those
who think. The world’s a tragedy for those
who feel.”

Like all such statements, this is a gross oversimplification.
There is one sure thing, however – you
need a sense of humour to survive the long
haul, the dementia, and the twisted logic
that passes for good sense – you need humour
to survive the madness of the northern winter.
And if you have no sense of humour, strong
drink just might get you through. In that case,
you might get the sense that others are laughing
at you.
It’s no fun being the butt of a joke, but think
of it this way… If there are times when you’ve been
on a bender and your neighbours are
laughing at you, consider that you are performing
a community service. Likely your neighbours
really do need the laughs.

Things you might not want to say when you
__________________________________
slide down into a bunker in Wait-A-Bit!
___________________________________

Is that shotgun loaded?

It’s winter.Why do you still have six tins of fly spray
on your table?

Does that dog bite? Good God, IS THAT A DOG?

Where’s your bathroom?

It smells like motor oil in here…. Did you just
blow a seal?

Where do all those furs come from? Dear God,
is that fur in the corner moving?

It obviously isn’t English…What’s your
first language?

That’s a weird coffee maker on the table.
What’s the boiler for?
It smells like a still? Is that a still?

Where’d you get all those weird postcards?
They look like they’re from the fifties.

How’s the mail delivery around here?
DO YOU HAVE MAIL DELIVERY
around here?

Why don’t you turn on the lights,
so we can see each other?

Where’d ya get all those yellow candles?
Posted by William Milne at 3:51 AM
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▼ 2014 (80)
▼ December (6)
TRAIN THRU MY BATHROOM WINDOW…………DEATH CAN…
OF SEX, JEALOUSY AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE
LIVING IN THE GRAND HOTEL..THE GREAT CIRCLE OF LIF…
SANTA’S GUIDE TO: SURVIVING YOUR PERSONAL FETISH…..
A COMIC’S GUDE TO HALLUCINATIONS AND TOXIC PSYCHOS…
GUILLERMO’S INFERNO — WRITING IN UTTER FLOW!!!
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About Me
My Photo

William Milne
As years go by, there are more and more things I find not to do. Silence is becoming essential, and loud music
Born in North Bay, Ontario, I grew up in Jamaica, West Indies, in the Parish of St. Anne Now back up north, spend time in hut on cliff top, paddling a light canoe, when available

After a few years of enforced restraint, ha! Ha! I’m going to do some singing on stage again, name – John Rock and the Angels put out a CD called, “It;s So Serious!” Have to re-master. Now doing CD “Wild Kingdom – A Johnny Rock Retrospective” (double disc)

I’m just starting to work on the internet, so I’m slowly figuring things out, will release some stories and songs.

Check out my blog at zappadat.blogspot. com,
” Roving Reporter Rants” Nag Hammadi Gospels, Books – “Lovers, Fiends and Remembrances”, “Tales of the Roving Reporter” Humor when possible.

“I hope my angel will not come a fiend, as fiends so often rise in love affairs.” William Shakepeare

web page at http://www.rovingreporter.ca
which I need to develop along with Walker Ballantine’s Facebook Timeline.

“The definition of madness is loss of a sense of humour.” Hunter S. Thompson (God bless him!”)

View my complete profile
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